Finally!

My blog hasn't been working...but now it is! Here's an article that I wrote for Point Loma's paper a few weeks ago:



Learning proper subway etiquette has been a vigorous process from the get-go. To look like a “local” (and a local I am not) takes directional skills, superior balance, and the ability to get from place to place without being glued to the subway map hidden in your book. These are lessons that can be learned without experience, but here are five things that I’ve learned through living in the Big Apple:
1. Listen to people’s conversations whenever you can, because you might learn something useful, like whether or not the train is going to all stops or if the man on the corner is still selling faux Chanel. Not everyone can be taken to0 seriously, though. For example, my first week I saw a 12 year old boy wrench himself against the railing as he proceded to wail “BUT I DON’T WANNNNNA GO TO BROOKLYN!” For a second I wondered if I should be worried about Brooklyn too—but I’ve been fine so far.
2. It is absolutely possible to get on the wrong line, even if you’ve been using the right one for weeks. I did this two days ago (and again this morning). This will only result in looking like a newbie if you curse and jump out of your seat upon realizing your mistake (this I did this morning as well).
3. If it looks like water, it might be water…but it might be something else, especially after 10pm when the Subway stations become considerably warmer than the outside air.
4. Subway vermin do exist. In general they stay on the tracks, where no human should ever be anyways. Avoid looking too grossed out or else people will know that you’re not from around these parts.
5. Except for those who have either millions in the bank or a personal sugar daddy, public transportation is everyone’s way of getting around. Consequently, the subway is always an eclectic group of people and it is important to be aware of who’s around you. A few days ago a man claiming to be “the Second Son” (Abel as opposed to Cain) prophesized and preached for a full 7 stops. Those who acknowledged his censuring by looking at him received the gift of personal condemnation. In general, the best way to avoid confrontations with the crazies is to avert your eyes and to turn up your iPod.